My mom always said..."Don't make promises you can't keep"

We all make promises...often I find myself making promises I know I won't keep to my friends. I make promises like, "Yeah, I'll call you later," or "Let's get together soon - coffee, lunch, dinner?" I make these promises to myself too, I'll exercise everyday this week, I'll keep the house spotless all week, the list could go on.... I do this same thing to God. I'm not proud of it - but I do it. God, I promise I will spend more time with you and in your word. Lord, I will give my entire life and heart to you and my ENTIRE day I will focus on you and your plan for my life. While these promises are noble I can hear in the back of my mind the old phrase, "don't make promises you can't keep. Tonight, I learned this isn't just some old saying, it's biblical.

In Ecclesiastes 5: 4-6a the author (probably Solomon) says: "When you make a vow to God, do not delay in fulfilling it. He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your vow. It is better not to vow that to make a vow and not fulfill it. Do not let your mouth lead you into sin."

There is so much packed into this scripture. Ecclesiastes 5 is focused on standing in awe of God. I am wasting my time spitting out empty promises to a God who is so much bigger and wiser than me. Instead of trying to make promises to Him I can't keep I will focus on standing in awe of Him. I will declare His might, His glory, His love, His creation, and I will stand in awe that a God who controls the waves, who can move mountains, who made the sun stand still would love me. I will meditate on His sovereignty and grace and mercy.

Dedicated to Steve Luther.

A wonderful man, husband, father, friend, and soon to be grandfather went to spend his eternity with the Lord a few hours ago. One of our long time family friends, Steve Luther had a heart attack on October 29, 2009 and suffered a 2nd heart attack 3 months later (to the day.) In the past 3 months he had done everything the doctors told him to and yet God still called him home this morning. What a difficult reminder that God has numbered our days and that we should live each one to the fullest. Embrace this new year you have been given and thank God for all of the blessing He has bestowed upon you. Don't be afraid to tell people you love them, soak your self in the word of God, spend time in fellowship, share with others the hope and freedom you have in Christ.

Lessons from the dishwasher: Just skip the rinsing process!

I need to sleep. My schedule is going to be so jacked up by the time I go back to school I don't know what I'll do. I haven't seen 1:00am in I cannot tell you how long. I feel like a rebel :) Tonight was fun. I am so blessed that God has put in my life such incredible men and women that love Him and want to honor and serve Him. It was pretty amazing to look around my living room and see 15 or so people who I genuinely love with all my heart spending time together in fellowship. I am so blessed. My amazing friends...they are messy; and despite the ladies wonderful help in getting things put together I just couldn't go to bed without it all clean - it's sick I know.

So, I just finished cleaning up the last of the mess from my after Christmas Christmas party and I can hear the quiet hum of the dishwasher as I type. I shoved so many dirty dishes in the dishwasher before I turned it on. Tonight I skipped the rinse step and just put them all in without getting all the junk off first. I set it on heavy wash and extra high heat and hit start. IT takes a little longer, and uses a little more water and energy, but the dishes are cleaner in the end with less work for me too. :) What a great illustration of what we do with God. He wants our junk. He wants us to come to him with all the dirty, gross, stuck on food still on our plates. He doesn't expect us to go through the rinse process before we come to Him; in fact, he urges us not too.

How often do I make a bigger mess of my life when I try to "clean up" some area of it before I take it to God. "Lord," I will say, " I know you have a perfect plan for my life and I am so excited and eager to know what it is, but I know you can't show it to me until I..." You can fill in the blank with any number of things. Until I what? It's not about me. It never has been. All God asks is that we come to Him...Just As We Are. I need to stop trying to rinse off my dirty spots before handing my life to God. It won't always be easy and maybe God will have to use some high heat, extra water, and heavy washing to make me into the woman He created me to be; but He is way better at getting off the tough stuck on "junk" than I will ever be. I will be a much "cleaner" version of me in the end!

Tonight I quit rinsing! I am laying all of myself at God's feet. I can't hide my dirty plate from God.What dirty spots are you trying to clean up before you go to God? Why? He sees the mess we make - He sees the beautiful person we are beneath the mess. The one that He made and made for a purpose. Skip the rinse - Go straight to God! Let Him make you clean!

Do Not Fear...

Tonight I came home to a lovely little surprise of toilet paper in my grandfathers Japanese maple, my bushesm and on my roof. Most peoples first thoughts are things along the line of, "crazy teenagers" or, "my friends are nuts." My thoughts...not so normal. My over active (or some would call it creative) mind started thinking about what crazy person had rolled my house and might now be inside waiting for me or lurking around in my pitch black yard. Of course I did what any scared little girl would do...I called my daddy. And like my knight in shining armor he drove the 25 minutes to my house to check for burgalers much like he checked for monsters under my bed. It wasnt until about five minutes after he left that I felt the quiet reminder that God says..."Do Not Fear!" He is my rock and my fortress and while I dont fear the future - things like, will I get married? Will I have kids? Will I ever have a different career? Etc.... I do have nights like tonight where some toilet paper makes me afraid to get out of my car in my own driveway. This is a huge flip from the girl who used to be so independent her friends and family often lectured (or yelled) at her. I think I need to learn the balance of a healthy fear and a healthy independence . Tonight I just need to find a way to stay here and sleep and not be freaked out...I will Not Fear...the Lord MY GOD is with me!!

So tonight was pretty hilarious. I guess you never know what may come when you allow 7 middle school girls free reign at a movie theatre. It started pretty calm - quiet chatting to the people they had come with while we walked to Q'doba, small talk while stuffing our faces at dinner, and me saying silent prayers that God would use tonight to bond them in some way. Boy did He answer prayers. The bonding came in the form a dance, during the movie & in the front of the theatre, to Hannah Montana's "hoedown throwdown" song. The best part...only one of the girls knew the actual dance to the song. Alot of arm flailing, jumping, and girlish laughter. I dont think anyone in the theatre actually minded...@ least I hope not. I remember during one part of the song I looked back (I chose to sit in the row in front of my girls) and saw them all laughing and looking at each other with sneaky little grins...still not sure what that was all about. We ended the evening eating ice cream and hanging out by the fountain at Stonecrest. Perfect weather and I kept hearing them laugh and say things like, "I know. This was so much fun!" It totally made my night - it made me think about how selfish I can be sometimes to not want to go out or email or call one of them (we all know that middle school girls could spend years of their lives on a phone!) It also made me realize how much I love them, how much I desire to be a positive influence in their life. It reminded me that I have to have my heart and mind saturated in the word so I can live out a life that exemplifies Christ in all areas. It made me look at some areas of my own life that I need to give to God so that I can really be an example for these girls now. I want to be someone who 12 years from now, when they are my age, (YIKES!) they can still depend on and look to as an example of a Godly woman. I have a lot of work to do...but I think loving them and praying for them is a pretty good start! And joining them for that Hannah Montana dance was a pretty good start too!!!

Giving it a shot...

This whole blogging "thing" feels a bit weird I must admit. However, I am giving in to my two beautiful friends who have so lovingly harassed me - and I am counting on at least the two of them reading my oh so fascinating words of wisdom. I think blogging is more about the writer than anyone else, but it's my prayer that God could use my words and reflections to encourage others. So for now I will leave it here...leave the millions of you who I know are hanging onto my words wondering what will she say next??? Happy Reading!